Genuflection Rejection

Last week, I heard some local morning radio show personalities interviewing a U.S. Army official about the U.S. Army’s 233th birthday. Interjected into the discussion about the ongoing local celebratory events was the usual stream of military propaganda painting the U.S. military as the world’s savior. Mr. Army Official bragged about the 170,000 new recruits that voluntarily signed up despite the general public’s disapproval for the war in Iraq as some sort of sorry attempt to sweeten our sour image of the world-class fakin ongoing fiasco since the illegal invasion many years and many senseless casualties ago.

He proudly commented that, despite public disapproval for Operation Ongoing Clusterfak, the volume of voluntary enlistments indicates there are still lots of suckers out there willing to sign on the dotted line to ‘serve their country’ and for that, we should thank them or any of the other members of our armed forces if we happen upon them in public. He actually suggested that if you spot a soldier in public that you should stop what you’re doing, approach this individual and thank them for all they sacrifice for us to protect our freedom. In other words, he was suggesting that we should genuflect to members of the armed services. Perhaps licking their boots would be a nice touch. If it happens to be a male soldier and you’re a female, while you’re licking their boots, you can truly show appreciation in another way if you’re willing to go the extra mile to say thanks.

I love how this guy talked of new recruits as if they signed up to fulfill their lifelong dream: the send-off to Iraq, Afghanistan or some other fak-forsaken place to die or suffer life-changing injury or be forced to stay there much longer than you originally agreed to because they need more soldiers to replace those dying every day. Yes, I can see how this would be an appealing prospect for young men and women and indeed the same feeling shared by the astronaut who dreamed of going to space from childhood, studied and trained for a duration that felt like a lifetime all while dreaming of the possibility of participation in an actual space mission. And then it actually happens finally. Same feeling I’m sure.

Ok, yes there are some in the armed forces that are gung-ho and have dreamed of being a soldier all of their lives. Usually these people are the products of military families where they’re just as likely to join and become a jarhead because they come from a long line of jarheads, almost genetically destined. Jarhead begets jarhead.

Some nobly do enlist out of ignorance because they truly believe they’re sacrificing their own desires for the good of their country but those are few and far in between. Those tend to be the people who get the fak out as soon as they can if they realize what they’re actually part of.

Ah, but what Mr. Army Official failed to mention during his radio bragfest were the methods utilized to score those numbers or hit those quotas as is said of military recruiters who have more in common with used car salespeople than most would think. They must find a way to sell an old lemon as if it’s a Maserati which is not an easy task so enter creativity and the fine art of bullshit peddling with a little law breaking to get the job done. What’s a little illegality if it’s for the good of our nation, right?

Mr. Army Official must’ve forgotten that part during his radio interview or he didn’t want to spoil the birthday celebration with the truth. What he failed to share with his audience were the details of recruitment these days when this Iraqi misadventure is costing us troops faster than we can churn out new ones.

So what’s a military recruiter to do when pressure to meet those quotas is oozing from the highest levels? How about preying on areas of the nation hit hard by downsizing – places where the only jobs are minimum-waged retail or fast food, where the best one can hope for is to one day be promoted from fry guy to drive-thru window to maybe assistant manager because that’s when the big bucks start rolling in? Maybe target areas where the education levels are pretty low and most aren’t going to college anyway so why not stroll those streets and see how many you can con into signing up for the U.S. Army or Marines as we saw in those scenes from Michael Moore’s Fahrenheit 911.

If you don’t have a high school diploma or GED or have a little problem with drug addiction, have no fear. That’s no longer a problem because helpful recruiters can turn you into a high school graduate with some fake documents to satisfy that requirement and miraculously ‘cure’ your drug addiction with handy tips on how to beat the drug test.

The armed forces will take ANYONE with a heartbeat. You may think criminals and illegal immigrants need not apply but NO. True equality in America means the military also welcomes criminals and illegal immigrants with open arms. Story after story appeared in every media channel and multiple books about desperate recruiters who broke every rule in the book, hell they burned the rule book and found work-arounds for every possible reason they’d previously turn down a potential recruit. Along with lying to recruits and promising they’d never see action because we were bringing soldiers back from Iraq(yes, dead), military recruiters were also reaching further south into Mexico and Central America and promising illegal immigrants a ticket to a green card if he/she were willing to enlist.

And here you thought you had to be an American citizen to serve.

But let’s think about this. If you recruit the dregs of society or those without much else going for them because they live in a place gutted by economic slowdown or illegal immigrants that won’t say squat for fear of being kicked out of America, it’s a lot easier to pull shit on them and get away with it. I can’t say I’ve met many brainiacs that were military. Most of them are either quite brainwashed or quite dumb or an imbalanced combination of the two. They act as if they’re holier than thou because they’re in the army or the navy or because they’ve traveled the world. However, ever notice that despite their frequent flier miles, most of them haven’t learned a fakin thing from traipsing around the world? Instead of gaining any knowledge from their travels, they merely collect trinkets to put on their mantel or kitchen magnets and think that means they’re ‘worldly.’ They haven’t learned a fakin thing but then again, the attitude is that America is supreme, and they insist that the rest of the world is wrong and should be doing it our way. With that attitude, there is no way you’re going to learn anything hence why we have so many fakin stupid soldiers floating around.

So now we’re to bow down and lick the boots of our soldiers simply because they are military and of course because they passed the stringent standards(ie having a human heart beat) of military recruitment. Let’s face it: there are no longer any standards. They’ll literally take anyone. At one point, you had to at least have a high school diploma and be free of drugs and alcohol but not any longer. But since America is allegedly the land of equality, the US military welcomes everyone equally. Actually I suspect they prefer the drug addict, criminal types because it’s easier to recruit those without much other hope and given what the criminal activity the US military frequently engages in, it’s a streamlined process if you ‘hire’ criminals because they already have experience breaking the laws and don’t have those annoying issues with ethics that some do. Therefore if you’re a complete loser crackhead that can’t write your own name, don’t worry! Surely they’ll get someone to forge your signature. The US Army believes in you and will open the doors to opportunities you never could’ve dreamed of(insert propaganda brigade here) especially coffin doors. For some reason, they’re successfully selling this idea of ‘absolution’ – sin, enter the military, and not only are your previous sins forgiven but if you miraculously return to US soil alive, you can expect to be treated like a god or at the very least a hero simply because you wear the uniform. WOW! That’s better than those makeover shows where they take a frumpy 45 year old mother of 6 who’s still wearing her hair as she did in high school & dressing the same too & transform her into a cover model simply with a little makeup, new haircut & clothes(sound familiar?).

So next time you encounter a soldier, right before you bend down to slurp his butt, you may want to consider what you’re dealing with.

We’re to genuflect to these guys who may very well be criminals while some of us have never broken the law, have higher educations and adhere to a strong code of general decency, have traveled but unlike the military minds have learned something during the process. Therefore, forgive me if I’m not impressed by someone in battle fatigues let alone thank them for their stellar existence as a human being.

WHAT THE FAK! You want me to bow before a jarhead and thank him/her for the sacrifices he/she has made to improve my life? Even if you’re able to get past the whole ‘he might be an illegally recruited criminal or immigrant or drug addict’ and you’re able to overlook that great possibility because of the sacrifices made to serve in the armed forces, still no one is able to tell me why we should regard the military like deities - that is, if we were the type to worship deities. But please let’s not rely upon the old standby reason of all: ‘because they are protecting our freedom.’ Let me tell you: that may very well go down as THE most successful marketing(ie propaganda) campaign in history. The US government has successfully pulled the wool over the public’s eyes and has most of them – even those opposed to the war – believing that we should thank the armed forces stationed in Iraq for ‘protecting our freedom.’ We weren’t invaded by a foreign army, and our military is not kicking them out to protect our freedom. For those of you not paying attention, the US invaded Iraq, not the other way around.

The last time I checked, I’m not an Iraqi and I’m not living in Iraq. This slogan, if you will, is the one that really fries me because it’s a completely illogical claim to assert that troops in Iraq are fighting to protect our freedom. Where? 5000+ miles away in a foreign country? How is my freedom, as an American citizen, being threatened there? Please someone explain this to me.

If anything, this military action under this administration has done nothing but infringe upon constitutionally granted American freedoms. Via an assortment of civil liberty violations like illegal wire taps and spying on Americans in general, most people can’t see the fight for our freedom is happening right here within the boundaries of America. Our freedom is most threatened right here at home by the Bush administration with one constitutional violation after another but masqueraded under the guise of necessities due to terrorist threats(how convenient) yet no one seems to consider that as big a threat as the fictional threat the propaganda spin machines churn out over Iraq. Just ask people in general what the troops are in Iraq for and I’ll bet the majority will answer – like trained parrots: ‘fighting to protect our freedom.’

Support the troops – yes fine. Support the troops and wish for their safe return but please let’s not buy into this bs they’re fighting to protect our freedom when that’s not even a logical argument from 5000 miles away. And please don’t try to tell me I should pay homage to them as if they’ve done something for me. I love the ones who act as if we owe them something or think they’re better because they’ve traveled the world. These tend to be the ones that would otherwise be in jail if it weren’t for the military giving them a job. Since they can’t throw a ball or run really fast, they weren’t good candidates for the other option for losers who’d otherwise be incarcerated: professional sports. Therefore, they had to settle for the military track. But then again, perhaps they’ll sharpen their throwing skills by tossing grenades or running faster than they ever knew they could while trying to outrun enemy gunfire or friendly fire when their fellow alcoholic soldiers get liquored up one night and mistake each other for insurgents. The possibilities are endless. These are the guys they want us to worship but the liberal intellectuals are communists. Yeah ok.

People who are fighting for our right to constitutional freedom by speaking out against violations are being called communists by the fakin morons in this country who don’t understand that patriotism is not constituted by nodding your head in agreement with what your government tells you without questioning the validity of the reasons given and waving your flag or slapping one of those annoying ‘support the troops’ ribbon magnets on your car next to your Jesus fish. Funny how the 2 always seem to appear together, isn’t it?

Flag flying does not a patriot make. The real patriots are those watching and questioning their government to keep democracy in check and protecting our freedoms from denigration by an imbalance of power towards tyranny which we’re alarmingly on the brink of and moving closer to every day. People fail to understand that you can’t set up a democratic shop, turn the switch to auto-pilot and let that baby fly while the real pilot goes to take a nap. Someone needs to be watching the shop at all times. Why is it we applaud those physically watching our borders but this society shuns those speaking out to protect freedoms we stand to lose if no one stands up to protect them simply by saying: NO, this is not right. Why are those people labeled ‘communists’ while we’re to genuflect to the soldiers as heroes even if those soldiers are pulled from the pool of illiterate criminals that pressured recruiters pushed through the system illegally just to fill those quotas?

Go ahead, call me a commie! Tell me I have a lot of nerve writing such a piece when our troops are enduring such hell while fighting for our freedom. Go ahead and do those things but before I’ll pay you a bit of attention you must: be able to accurately define communism and explain logically how my statements are communistic. I love when I ask one of these dumb faks to explain how I’m a communist or even simply to define communism. Usually the answer is something very Merriam Webster’s like: “Communists are people who don’t support the troops or speak ill of OUR president.” Calling me a commie without foundation isn’t going to cut it just like many of the explanations this administration gives for putting thousands of troops in harm’s way for lies and bullshit reasons that make absolutely NO sense to a functioning brain. No one’s yet to provide me with a logical explanation of how our troops over 5000 miles away in Iraq (again, not a US territory officially…….yet) are fighting to protect our freedom.

Needless to say, I won’t be bending over to kiss army ass anytime soon.

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